Ep25: Acceptance and Confidence

Acceptance is key for anyone who wants to reduce stress and build confidence. Because when we learn how to accept the events in our lives it will help us reduce chatter and gain confidence in the decisions we make.

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Episode Transcript

Note: The podcast is not scripted and is transcribed using software. The transcript is nearly verbatim but may not be exact and may include minor grammatical errors or edits for ease of reading.

Intro

Welcome to I Can, I Am, I Will. The world’s #1 podcast for confidence and self-empowerment. Today we’re going to talk about acceptance, the concept of acceptance, and how it will help to improve not only your confidence and self-empowerment but also every area of your life. It will also help you reduce stress and worriment. It really is a topic that we should all know.

My name is Lyndsey, I’m a confidence and self-empowerment coach and if you want to build your confidence and your self-empowerment then you are in the right place.

Before we begin, I ask you to please like, share, comment, leave reviews. It will really help me out.

And also before we begin I just wanted to note that I’m doing a 100 podcasts in 100 days series. This is the 25th episode, so I am a quarter towards my goal, And I make goals like this just to give me something to work towards. Once I work towards and accomplished one goal it builds my confidence to help me work towards and accomplish other goals.

I’m telling you this because I am encouraging you to do the same thing. And no it does not need to be 100 podcasts in 100 days. You can have a goal of maybe eating steel cut oats every day for two weeks, or going for a walk in the morning every day for 30 days.

Or you can do, I have a friend he did 100 days of 45 minutes of meditation every day. And if you have a goal, when you achieve that goal, then that will build your confidence up and it will help spread to every area of your life.

Acceptance

OK so we’re going to talk about acceptance today. And I wanted to begin by reading a passage from a book that I very much enjoyed. It’s called “A New Earth.” It is a New York Times—so it’s “A New Earth” by Eckhart Tolle and he is a number one New York Times bestseller of “The Power of Now.” A book I started reading and then I never finished it. I should really get back on that.

Anyway, if you have not read the book “A New Earth” I would highly recommend that you read it I think that you can find a PDF of it online for free I’m not sure. I got my copy for $0.25 at a used bookstore. He talks about acceptance on page 296 towards the end of the book, and I’m going to read what he wrote:

“Acceptance. Whatever you cannot enjoy doing, you can at least accept that this is what you have to do. Acceptance means: for now, this is what this situation, this movement requires me to do, and so I do it willingly.”…

“For example, you probably won’t be able to enjoy changing the flat tire on your car at night in the middle of nowhere and in the pouring rain, let alone be enthusiastic about it, but you can bring acceptance to it. Performing an action in the state of acceptance means you are at peace while you do it. That piece is a subtle energy vibration which then flows into what you do. On the surface, acceptance looks like a passive state, but in reality it is active and creative because it brings something entirely new into this world. That piece, that subtle energy vibration, is consciousness, and one of the ways in which it enters this world is through surrendered action, one aspect of which is acceptance.”

“If you can neither enjoy or bring acceptance to what you do—stop. Otherwise, you are not taking responsibility for the only thing you can really take responsibility for, which also happens to be the one thing that really matters: your state of consciousness. And if you are not taking responsibility for your state of consciousness you are not taking responsibility for life.”

Acceptance and Higher Consciousness

So I really appreciate his notes on acceptance and his viewpoint of acceptance. I would encourage you, when you read something, or even when you listen to me give my thoughts on a topic, for you to take the things that make sense to you. And you don’t have to take in everything. If something doesn’t make sense to you and you consider it and you don’t appreciate it you, don’t have to adhere to that into your stream of consciousness.

With acceptance, the thing that I appreciate what he was saying is how even if you have to do something you don’t want to do, when you accept it, you are coming to a higher level of consciousness. And what I take from that is you are not worrying or feeling anxious. And without worrying and feeling anxious you’re reducing your stress. And that’s really what acceptance is about.

For instance on Sunday nights my friend text me a lot and he says that he gets he calls it this Sunday scaries. And that he thinks about how he doesn’t want to go to work on Monday. I do not have that. I don’t feel Sunday scaries because I have accepted that I go to work on Mondays and there’s nothing really, there’s nothing else for me to do there.

I’ve already accepted that it’s a reality and I don’t want to ruin my Sunday night where I’m relaxing on my couch and reading or maybe I’m watching TV. I don’t want that night to be ruined with my worriment with thoughts going towards work the next day.

Acceptance Reduces Stress

Because what happens there is, I’ll be thinking about work when I’m not at work. So then work is upsetting me or stressing me out outside of work. And then when I actually get to work, I’ll already be stressed out about it because I’ve been thinking about it on my Sunday night. So then your Sunday night is kind of ruined and then you get to work at you’re already stressed out.

So when you work on having acceptance it’s really about being in the present moment and accepting what you are doing even if it’s not something you want to be doing, and moving on from there, or moving forward from there. And sometimes people can think that if you accept something it means that you’re in agreement with it.

Or if you accept something it means that you’re kind of like laying down and you’re not standing up for yourself. That is not what we’re talking about here. Acceptance is the acknowledgement that something has happened but it does not mean that you are OK with it.

Acceptance is Not Defeat or Agreement

Similarly to how validation in the previous episodes is something that I said you can validate someone but it doesn’t mean that you are agreeing with them, or that it’s right. So something happened, say that you get I don’t know screwed over on a bill or something happens, and it’s giving you a whole bunch more work. You can accept that happened because the situation has happened. You can accept that it happened and then take certain action steps in order to make sure it either doesn’t happen again or to fix the situation in your favor.

But it’s going to be easier for you to work through the situation when you accepted that it happened. And you hear sometimes people say, “I can’t believe it, I can’t believe this happened.” They are trying to work through that acceptance. I feel that we all naturally try to get to that accepting state. However, if we haven’t been taught how to get to that acceptance state it might be difficult. And again, you hear people, “I can’t believe it, I can’t believe this happened, I can’t believe they did that.”

Because sometimes it’s hard to accept something because we weren’t prepared for it. But if something has happened, instead of not believing that it happened, we should focus towards accepting. And you can say, “I can’t believe this happened, I’m going to work towards accepting it.” You don’t have to necessarily automatically accept things as they come.

Confident Close

Acceptance is something that you learn. It is something that, it’s like a muscle that you build. And we’re going to get into acceptance and talk to you about acceptance in the coming episodes. I hope that you accept that—wow that was a bad joke.

OK we’re going to end with her I affirming statements.

Are you ready?

I can,

I am,

I will.

Have a good day!